Something noteworthy happened today in Westfield, New Jersey. The house that my parents bought in 1959 when I was 1 year old was sold. The closing took place this afternoon and as of now the house I had known all my life no longer belongs to my family.
I made the six-hour drive last weekend to pick up some odds and ends and say my last goodbyes. It’s funny how things worked out. My three siblings were very much involved with my mom’s last six months in the hospital and then I was very much involved in getting the house ready to pass on to new owners.
They did the things that were involved with people whereas I did the things that were involved with things. It brings to mind Helen Keller’s observation that blindness shuts you off from things while deafness shuts you off from people. I was useless in the hospital room (my last memories of Mom are seeing her say “He’s deaf!” to everyone who came in) but since Mom passed away in April I’ve been useful in packing, painting, cleaning and filling up dumpsters.
I left the house for the last time on Sunday Dec. 2 and of course it was hard to leave. Finally, in the place where I first learned photography some 40 years ago, I made one last walk-through with a video camera. Here are the results (first and second floors):
When it was time to leave, I drove past the house slowly with the camera going:
Finally, I stopped at the cemetery and brushed the snow off the grave covers I brought over the day before and took this picture:
I think my mom and dad have a nice final resting place, don’t you?
7 Comments
December 8, 2007 at 2:42 pm
Tom,
It is beautiful house, Old Blue Lady. It is seem so beautiful Antiquie inside of bedroom. It have a different desgined. I think it is historical house. it is nearly 100 year old.
I love antiquie. I know how much you feel weird when your parents gone. Last time you have been lived that house for long time and visit your mother. I know why you called that house ” Old Blue Lady.” your mom love color blue.
It is hard to let it go and sell the house. I can related that. you have to say “Good bye Old Blue Lady!”
Deaf Pixie
December 17, 2007 at 8:42 pm
Tom ..
Thank you for sharing an intimate picture of your life. Your story about the “Old Blue Lady,” reminded me of my own childhood home.
Whenever I go back home, and am in the neighborhood I grew up in, I almost always make a quick detour to see who’s living in my old house. And then I wonder who they are, and what they think of the house itself; and if they feel the same way I did and still do, too.
Thank you for the pleasure of reminding me of a good childhood memory.
Paotie
February 7, 2008 at 12:44 pm
Beautifully cared for home, Tom. Wonderful memories you are preserving both on film and in your mind. Please accept my deepest sympathies for the loss of your Mother.
February 7, 2008 at 1:24 pm
wow beautiful house and is it for sale and yea they have a beautiful resting place too
February 7, 2008 at 2:53 pm
I like your house blue old lady very much and I feel so sorry that your mother is gone
. I am a hearing impaired person (deaf) and I love to read the deaf weekly newsletters very much. My mother is 87 years old still alive almost 88 years this June 2008. When I was a little girl around 3 or 4 years old that I went to the hearing test that my hearing test was a profound hearing loss (82 and 80 percent hearing loss) but I have some hearing without hearing aid not much but I can wear two hearing aids when go out not inside my aparment because too much rap music downstairs neighbor 2nd floor bedroom that i live at 3rd floor apt bedroom/den where I use my home computer.
February 8, 2008 at 10:03 am
I love the house. If I had the money, I would’ve bought it and let you visit it anytime.
I miss the house my grandparents had. They passed away and the house is being sold instead of being kept in the family. I guess I’ll never understand why a house isn’t kept in the family anymore. I guess the sentimental value of it is getting to me.
I am deaf. My life isn’t what I would’ve wanted and I miss my home neighbourhood. But I’m able to do what I wanted ever since I left. If I stayed with my family, I never would’ve been allowed to learn ASL. Someday, I’ll go back and look for a deaf community. I’ve wanted to move back. [somewhere in Michigan, in case you wanted to know]
February 10, 2008 at 5:42 pm
Thank you for the nice comments, they are all appreciated. Yes, the house was sold in December and my old neighbor, whom I’ve known all my life, is keeping her eye on things and keeping me informed via email .. new roof, workers, etc.
It does not bother me at all that the new owners will change everything to their own taste. My father built the whole kitchen himself 40 years ago but we knew all along that that would be the first thing to go.
Anything that improves the house is a good thing, and in fact I think it is cool the way houses can keep going and going through the years as the people come and go, washing through them like a wave.
I met the new owners a couple of times and they said that we were welcome to come back and see what they’ve done. I might just take them up on it.
I agree with you, Mina, it’s too bad that houses are not kept on through generations. In our case, all four of us “kids” have our own lives in other places. Selling the house gave us money to do things, and in my case I want to buy property that I can pass on to my own kids, keeping the cycle going into at least the fourth generation. (My parents bought their house with help from my grandfather.)
That is life, and thanks to the slow real estate market I was able to have several months to get the house ready for its send-off and deal with its loss and get some cool pictures and videos along the way.